“our God is greater, our God is stronger. God, you are higher than any other. our God is healer, awesome in power, our God, our God. & if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us? & if our God is with us, then what could stand against?”—
rant of the day: french class. i really like the french language + culture but i HATE my class.
i believe that teachers are supposed to encourage students to want to learn, participate, and at least try in the class. my teacher doesn’t do any of that. -_- i want to cry when it’s time for french class…i count down the minutes til it’s over. i try to participate and answer questions but he is so discouraging. he called on me once and i was in the middle of answering when he moved on to someone else like i didn’t know the answer or something. it was so condescending. i feel like that’s his attitude towards some of us. he ALWAYS makes me repeat my answers cause he “didn’t hear me.” BULL! i was talking in a normal tone of voice! i really enjoyed the class freshman and sophomore year cause we learned a lot. last year, we learned NOTHING. all we ever heard in class was our teacher whining and complaining about how the ap exam sucks and how we have no chance of passing. this year, he’s decided to overload us with work since last year’s seniors didn’t have such a great pass rate for the ib exams. he always checks homework when i didn’t finish it and i when i actually spend time to do it, he never checks it! why would i want to do the work then? when i could be spending time doing other things that actually benefit me and my grade. that’s the only class that i’m not doing well in. -_- freshman year he told us he was a family man and he served in his church so i was like, oh cool! sophomore year, he was drugged up on his meds…um, okay? sketch. junior year, constant bad mood. we’re all like what happened to our teacher…? i really wish i had a different teacher. sigh. Lord, help me get through this year in that class…
i feel like i'm walking on egg shells when i'm talking to you.
i know you’re really tired & stressed out so i just don’t want to do or say anything that will make you mad. :/
you’re constantly on my mind. i miss you. i hope this semester goes by quickly & i hope we can talk more next semester…but i can already feel the distance between us. i miss our long talks, the randomness, the arguments because you always denied everything. you always made me smile&laugh. i hope you miss me too, at least a little bit. hang in there.
someone put me in a big city, pleaseee. this small town will be the death of me.
i’ve had this desire to live in the city since forever. i just want to get out of here. it’s been my motivation to do well in school. but who knows what will happen…only God does, and if he wants me to go, i’ll go. if he wants me to stay…i’m going to pray really hard for him to keep me sane and break me down so i can do what he wants me to do…or else i just mighttt go crazy.
"i'm waiting, waiting for nothing. you're leaving, leaving me hanging. when did your heart go missing?" imissyou.
my current facebook status. i introduced you to this song. remember when you used to text me parts of it and i’d reply the rest? well, i posted it for you. i hope you see it & i hope you realize that i’m talking about you. (buuttt you probably won’t)
Professor:My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor:You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?
Professor:Is Satan good?
Professor:Where does Satan come from?
Professor:That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Professor:Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Professor:So who created evil?
(Student didn't answer)
Professor:Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Professor:So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor:Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Professor:Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Professor:Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student:No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Professor:Yet you still believe in Him?
Professor:According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student:Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor:Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student:Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Student:And is there such a thing as Cold?
Student:No, sir, there isn't.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student:Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pin-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student:What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor:Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student:You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light... But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it's called Darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?
Professor:So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student:Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor:Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student:Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor:If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student:Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student:Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student:Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student:Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor:I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student:That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
when i hang out with the girls, one thing we ALWAYZ talk about, pretty much without fail, is BOYS. why are they always giving us trouble? haha i don’t like seeing my friends hurt and stress over guys. i FINALLY truly realize that God is first in everything. especially when it comes to relationships. i want a guy who loves Jesus and puts him first or else the relationship isn’t going to work out no matter how hard you try. you’ll only end up hurt. been there, done that. too many times. -_-
so i was thinking in bed the other day and i like came up with a list of what i want to do with my future boyfriend lollll random!
1. i really want to take pictures of him! he’s definitely gonna be my model lmao he better like the camera or else he’s gonna hate me :P haha and i hope he’s into photography too so we can go on like photo trips and take pictures together.
2. try new things together.
3. go on road trips.
4. cook together!
5. just chill listening to music, but no talking.
6. watch the sunrise from a rooftop.
7. talk for hours about anything and everything.
8. movie nights!
9. serve the Lord together.
10. ride bikes together. lol, i really like bike riding…:P
this always happens to me. in my earlier post, i said i was done. coincidentally, you decided to IM me today. of all days. -_- stop giving me hope! grr, i guess i’m not done. i feel a little bad for saying i was done now because you’re telling me about your all nighters and stuff…idk, i guess i was being selfish… well, that’s with one of you anyways, the other one…psh, whatever. too cool for me i guess. lol yerim, “GIRLFRIENDS SUCK! THAT’S WHY I’M NOT A GIRLFRIEND!” :]
you know what? I GIVE UP. i’m done with you two. i miss you a lot, but obviously you don’t care as much as i do about our friendship. if you don’t want to be in my life, that’s fine. i won’t bother you anymore.
i saw you this morning. did you see me? you should’ve since you passed right by me. i wanted to say hi, but you didn’t even glance my way.
obviously you’re too busy for our friendship so i’m not even going to bother anymore.
sad thing is, i would run to you two in a heartbeat if you needed me.
whooooop. i’m excited to be more involved in relay for life! and i’m excited for fca & love146! i’ve noticed that i really like supporting good causes/giving back to the community, especially in fun ways and with groups. maybe that’s common though :P hopefully i can impact people’s lives and bring them to Christ? *fingers crossed* teehee.
i miss having long hair, but i’m glad i cut my hair at the same time. it’s weird, like i want my hair to be long again, but not like how it was before? haha idk. i can’t wait to braid it and attempt to have “pretty, but messy hair” lolll :D
why am i so lazy? i’ve been procrastinating a lot, like alwayz. i need to work on my film, apps, portfolio, studying for sat, doing homework early, etc. etc. etc. the list could go on forevaarr. c’mon christine, only a few more months! sigh.
night of joy was a lot of fun (: we saw david crowder and chris tomlin! praising with all of those people was just really amazing even though everyone was exhausted by the end. we got to ride space mountain (daa besttt), the buzz lightyear ride, and some railroad train roller coaster thing haha we didn’t have much time by the time the concert was over. wet n’ wild was lots of fun too! :] it was really great spending time with my youth group and getting to know some of the newer kids. it was all so relaxing, but now back to reality. i’m going to miss everyone next year.
i’m so tired from this weekend, i wish i didn’t have school monday. :( i really need time to catch up on my work…sigh.
i hope my photo shoot idea works out…i always have “good” ideas, but when i try to execute them, it turns out BLEH.
i spend way too much time on the computer…i should probably try to change that.
i have those moments where i feel so lucky and happy to have all these people in my life, but then i have those moments where i feel like i have no one. is that just me? or do other people feel that way sometimes?
i really want to make the most out of my senior year, but i feel like i can’t do much til next semester… okay, i’m done with all of this randomness. x
i want to turn my dreams into reality; i want to accomplish my goals. i’m in constant fear of "waking up," failing, and disappointment. i’ve been constantly worrying about my future and what colleges i’m gonna get accepted to and where i’m going to go. i know i should leave it up to God, but it’s such a big part of my life and with all of these apps and tests, i can’t help it. in the end, i’ll go where God wants me to go, but i guess i’m just a little scared that it’s going to be somewhere i don’t really want to go…sigh.
it feels like i’ve been in school for two months, but it’s only been three weeks. -_- lolwut? this semester better go by quickly…i’ve never been more excited for second semester in my LIFE. i can’t wait to get SAT over with and apps turned in. a huge weight will be lifted off my shoulders.
i’m excited, yet worried about FCA. i really hope we’re an active club this year and actually carry out our ideas and make an impact in our community. but i’m also worried because not everyone might care as much as i do so it might be tough. i feel like already we’ve had some challenges even trying to start the club, but nobody said the christian life was easy. as long as we do it for God, He’ll make a way for us. <3
night of joy tomorrow at disney world! woohoo! i’m exciteddd. :D finally get to have some fun with my youth group!
i should probably read for english now…i waste too much time on the computer…-_-
i’m sosososo happy that there’s no school tomorrow! cause i need to do my EE and we all know that christine is the best when it comes to procrastinating. :] hahah
so, while i was volunteering yesterday i got bit by something (i thought it was a mosquito but my mom said it’s probably something else) 40+ times. no, that 0 and + are not typos. -_- so now i have all this medicine stuff on and hopefully it goes away soon. blah.
i can’t wait for night of joy & wet n’ wild this weekend! whoop! it’s gonna be lots of fun (: but i’m sad that it’s like my last night of joy with my church :/ gonna make the most of it!
i reallyreallyreally need to study for SAT because i have been slacking for the past few weeks…eek. i just want it to be over! gr.
anyways, i should probably at least TRY to work on my EE now. toodles<3
my dad. he provides, he cares, he loves, he protects, he guides, he sacrifices, he does everything for his family. i think my dad is the best and i wish i could show him that i’m really thankful for everything, but i’m bad at expressing myself sometimes (and i think i got that from him too haha). i feel like we have bad timing when we try to talk because he’s really quiet and i’m pretty quiet so we don’t have many conversations, but sometimes he’ll try to talk to me and i’m in a bad mood so i don’t feel like talking and then i kind of regret it because i lost a moment with him. i really want to spend a lot of time with family before i go off to college because we won’t be able to hang out as much when i’m gone. i love my dad a lot, i just have difficulty showing it. he’s the best. <3
there are so many people that are slowly fading out of my life that i miss a lot. it makes me pretty sad…:/ especially since this is most likely my last year here. i want to spend as much time with everyone i care about and make lots of memories.
i really miss you and i hope you do too, but i can never tell how you feel. i miss talking to you all day about everything and at the same time, absolutely nothing. you made me laugh and smile and i’ll admit it, i did start to like you, even though at the time i was trying not to because it was all bad timing. sometimes i wonder, "what if i didn’t go to korea, what if i was here all summer, would things have been different?" but what’s meant to be has happened. you meant and still mean a lot to me, but i’m afraid i didn’t and don’t mean a whole lot to you.
why is it so hard for me to be supportive? i look at you and i want to talk to you, but the words just don’t come out of my mouth. i think you’re happy and i should be happy that you’re happy, right? i guess i’m just bummed out that we don’t talk or hang out as much and i’m kind of worried that we won’t be as close since you’re with her now. but it’s our last year and after high school, who knows if we’ll ever see each other again? i wonder if you even care or notice that we don’t talk as much.